legal assistance?

[edawgm]

She needs to go to the womens shelter or whatever advocacy center is near her. They'll have all kinds of connections with lawyers and legal help.

That might not be a bad idea. I will defiantly have to tell her that. Thanks

[edawgm]

Is the husband in the military by chance?

By chance he is

Tony you are correct with the 1st shirt but she has done this before with no help. Her husband tells a lot of lies and for some reason others believe him. I am planing on talking to mine when I get the chance. But currently moving and having to be off base by the 27th, I am a little strained. Hopefully all goes well and everything will be out of this house by Sunday. Then I will have some time to take care of things.

[ou812pezz]

http://www.military-divorce-guide.co...ly-support.htm and http://www.divorcenet.com/states/nationwide/considering hope this helps. I can see why he wants custody of one child.

[edawgm]

http://www.military-divorce-guide.co...ly-support.htm hope this helps. I can see why he wants custody of one child.

Thanks!! This is some great help. I will defiantly give this to her tomorrow.

[erikharrison]

I've learned that the legal system is not always fair, justice isn't blind, the courts and juries are stuck on 19th century beliefs/values, and that apparently lieing, cheating, and manipulating can help someone win instead of the best person.

I learned that in the OJ case. Johnny Cochran FTW.

Best of luck on getting your kiddo Chris.

[Joshua]

I think she would but he keeps on doing things. It has been him doing all the BS because he wants everything his way or no way. He got a loan on the only vehicle they had that was paid off (being the one she drives) and just went and paid for a lawyer and she did not know anything about this because she was in Houston helping her mom out. Then while she was there, he closed their joint accounts and tried to strand her there. Then as soon (being today) as she got back he shows up at the house with his lawyer and gives her some paper work stating something like Emergency custody of the youngest kid because he told his lawyer she was doing drugs. So she has not had one of the best days.

Keep all those things documented and I mean details and dates/times and all that because it will be useful later. In Texas the family law leans heavily toward the female and she will end up using these details to rake him over the coals later, guaranteed. Judges will not be too happy about stuff like that.

[edawgm]

^I told her just that this morning. Found out something else this morning. Bad info on the Emergency custody papers. He just told her that and supposedly had his lawyer on the phone and he would not let her talk to the lawyer. But it is like I told her with out something in writing and signed by a judge he can say all he wants, it is not legal until something is issued to her by the court. We think he told her that because he thinks that she will take the kids and go to Houston. More to come, I am sure of it.

[captexas]

Yeah, they can talk all they want, but without it in writing signed by a judge she doesn't have to do anything or let him have the kids. If there was a hearing, she should have been served some kind of notice to appear. The husbands lawyer has to provide proof of service to the judge as well.

As Joshua stated, take lots of notes with dates/times and if she can, always have someone with her whenever he says he is going over so she has a witness that can testify to what the husband is doing. As Joshua stated and as I have learned through my custody battle, the courts, judges, and officials of the courts still tend to side with the mother when it comes towards child custody, even if that mother has a bad history and the father doesn't. In my case, a professional social worker was hired for $1800 to do a social/home study as ordered by the court. My ex has basically abandoned 3 of her kids, been in jail for various felony crimes, and admits to being on drugs in her past. I have never done drugs (never even smoked a cigarette), never been in trouble with the law, and I have done everything possible to be with my son after I found out he was mine. After two visits with my ex wife before meeting me, the social worker had already ruled me out in her mind! I couldn't believe it. I've had other attornies/mediators review her findings and they say she was just outright biased towards the mother figure from the beginning.

So tell the mom not to give up. The courts will not favor a husband that acts like her husband is acting or the threats he is making. He is treating the kids as property and pawns in his little tantrum and that is a big no-no. Even if he has proof of her cheating on him, all that will help him for is in the divorce part of their case, not in who is a better parent and who is best to raise the kids.

[edawgm]

Thanks Chris for the reply.

Bad thing about it is that he is still staying in the house with them. As I am typing this I have even become confused as to what the heck is going on. She does have a past kind of like that. But has left it all behind. I could understand if this was something she left behind 2 weeks ago but she has not been in trouble or done anything in the past 3.5 years. My wife of course is the one that hangs out with her and talks all the time but just from what I have seen and what my wife has told me she is all about her kids.

I know that they tent to favor the mother figure more than the father. But to tell the truth I really don't think I could raise my kids with out my wife. Everyone is different but with us, I would have to probably bow down to my wife for everything that she does for our kid (soon to be kids).

[jroescher]

You need to be very careful with your involvement in their relationship. These kinds of things can turn around really quick. If your asked to keep the kids, and the other shows up to get them, your put in a really bad legal position. As stated above, until there is a court order they both have just as much right as the other as to who has the kids. The police aren't going to back you either for the same reason. Also don't be surprised or dissapointed if suddenly they are back together stronger than ever. Maybe even blame you for getting in the middle and causing the problem.

As far as the kids go, until there is a court order, whoever has the kids keeps the kids. No one is going to force the other to give up a kid. period. And if they start fighting over a kid trying to pull it out of the arms of the other, someone is going to jail. period.

And yes, the legal system very much favors the mother.

And keep in mind what's really going on, the fastest and most effective way to get at someone is to do or use the kids. Works every time.