george ill try and make this short.
yes start the skimmer from the get go.
yes start the lighting in the refuge be sure and put some LR,and the macro in also.
on the supplements "none" untill you test for them and see that they are not where you want them to be. Regular water changes will take care of trace elements and most of your needs at the begining.

On the LR. 40 LBS is a good start but a general rule of thumb is 1-1.5 lbs per gallon. put as much in at the begining as your wallet can stand and as little baserock as possible. and any new pieces should be cured in a trashcan or other container then added to the tank.

and as far as steps go whew... you could ask 10 people and get 10 different answers.Mike paletta puts out a good book i think the name is New Marine Aquarium.

This Board is a great place to get any questions answered or help with your tank.
Hope i answerd your questions
Robert